Monday, August 31, 2009

I Had A Dream


That I was a little blond boy wearing Mary Jane shoes and Joey Lawrence was pushing me on a swing.

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Shirley always thought she was like other people


till the day her mother told her she was from The Land of the Giants.

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Just Another Day In Suburbia

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"You got the stuff?"

"You got the money?"

Saturday, August 22, 2009

2 Things are Certain to Happen at Weddings...

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...Someone always ends up in drunk in a corner, alone and crying and someone always busts out the CHICKEN DANCE!

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

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Black Dress: "I do not accept your new nose job, Helen. In that, there is no nose left. I also do not accept that you used MY plastic surgeon. My glove is now off. I challenge you to a duel, beotch."

Green Dress: "Shh, don't bother me while I'm practicing being Marilyn. I think the plastic surgeon did a fabulous job, you wench. And furthermore, I would duel with you, but my entire body has been Botoxed and I'm afraid I can't move. If I'm still here in a week, call an ambulance."

Black: "Yeaaah...I probably won't."

Monday, August 10, 2009

They have everything that you need to enjoy, You can hang out with all the boys...

...It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A....


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Blue: Nice ball handling...

Stripe: Nice rod jerking...